Day 19
Does your child’s room look like Target and Toys R Us unloaded a shipment of toys directly into their room? Can you find the floor amongst the stuffed animals, Legos, Polly Pockets, Transformers and Brats Dolls? When there are so many toys, our kids have a tendency still tell us they are boarded and have nothing to play with! Did you know that less is more, even in the case of toys! (Don’t tell your kids this..it’s our little secret!)
We love our kids right? (I know some days that questions is harder to answer than others…I tell my kids I always love you, I just don’t like what you did!) So as we are loving on our homes, our kids rooms are not to be ignored! I am a big proponent of teaching your children to take care of themselves. Teaching them to care for their belongings at an early age will be one of the greatest investments you can do. But you can’t expect your kids to care for their belongings if they don’t know how. We need to set them up for success!
There is not a one way solution for organizing toys! I am sorry I can’t give you an immediate solution, but I can give you guidelines to make it easier to do it yourself. I have a 3 Step Plan for getting control of your kids toys and having them help keep the room clean. Follow along:
Step 1: Purge Party
I don’t care if you have large or small rooms in your home, the principles apply no matter what! I have small bedrooms currently, but when we lived in Tennessee, our boys rooms were bigger than our upstairs is now! Regardless of size, it is time to purge. Gather all the toys in the room and begin to sort. If the toy is broken – it is time to toss it. Unless you are great at fixing things, toss the broken toys. Also, it is time to toss the toys that are missing pieces. The odds of finding the missing piece is about as good as me getting back into my junior high jeans!
For all they toys that remain, evaluate what they actually play with. I find most kids do want to keep all their toys, regardless if they have not played with them in years. They reattach themselves and are very committed to playing with the toys again. (Strange how they love their baby toys all over again when they are 9 years old!) To avoid the battle, I use the “Two Week Bag” technique. I find the toys I am sure they haven’t played with in a long time and think they never will again, and then place them in the two week bag and stash the bag in a place the kids would never be. If they ask for a toy that is in the bag, I tell them I will look for the toy in a little while. The toy will reappear and the kids are happy. If they haven’t asked for it in two weeks, the toy is donated or stored for future use. Out of sight out of mind is the key ingredient!
Once you have done your initial purge, it is time to ask the kids to help purge. Kids need and incentive to purge. I had one client offer her girls a new American Girl doll if they got rid of all the Barbies and Polly Pockets. The girls were so excited they happily gave up the toys. (If you have ever tried to keep track of Barbie shoes or Polly Pockets anything you can envision the happy dance that was performed by the mom!) This is not to say material things are needed to give incentive. You can tell the kids there will be more room for sleepovers, more space to play a game they like, or whatever motivates them.
Now one additional aspect of the purge is the parents attachment to the toys. You spent money on it! You have sweet memories of your children playing with it. You feel guilty if the relative or friend who gave them the toy finds out they no longer want it…The list goes on and on. Don’t guilt your child into keeping a toy. I have seen it over and over again. The child is ready to let go and the parent comes behind and says, “Oh, but you just got that and it was so expensive”. The child now holds onto it. This underestimated their decision making and hinders the progress! So if the toy is rejected by the kids…HOLD YOUR TONGUE!
Step 2: Location, Location, Location
Now that you are down to a manageable amount, it is time to assign homes for the toys. Like Dorothy says, “There’s no place like home”, and there is no better relation to that than finding homes for the toys! Get your children involved in this part of the process. If they take ownership in where things go, than they have no excuse as to why it is not put back. Also, this gives them a sense of independence. Don’t second guess where they want to keep something. You can suggest and guide, but ultimately if you want the child to clean up their rooms by themselves, they will be more likely to do it if they have some say in the organizing process.
Homes are places we (typically) want to return to. Look at the space and try to zone out where the toys will go. Try not to keep everything spread out across the room. This will make it hard to clean up. Set up stations like a preschool does. Think of categories and groups. Again, keep your children involved in this. What they think of a grouping may not be your idea, but if it works for them, that is all that matters. Remember to think on a child’s level, literally! Get down on your knees and see from your child’s perspective. If things are high or hard to get to, the kids may get the toy out, but forget them putting it away!
Containers are boundaries. Boundaries are set to create a limit. Limits are vital in organizing. If you need containers to help assign homes, think like a child! Clear plastic containers are great because the kids can see through them to know what is inside. This helps avoid the dump and run game kids like to play while looking for their toy of choice! Also, color containers are good for keeping things separated. You can assign colors to certain categories, like purple for doll clothes, or blue for action figures. Make sure the containers are durable! Nothing worse than seeing what a kid can do to an adorable basket..it isn’t pretty!
Labels help in more ways than you know. I know some feel it is organizing overkill, but for kids, it is vital. The excuses that fly, “I didn’t know where it was supposed to go” do work! Whether the label is a picture, words or a combination of the two, your kids (and their playmates) will know where the toys belong! Preschools use it and so should you!
Step 3: Maintain So You Don’t Go Insane
Maintenance is vital in keeping the toys at bay. Regularly purging through the toys is important so you don’t have major overhauls. Before any holidays, birthdays or special occasions where kids may be getting toys, purge before you bring anything else in. The incentive for the child it to make room for the new. Teach them about the “One In One Out” rule. For every toy that comes in, one must be donated. You are teaching your children generosity, sharing, and how to avoid living with excess!
In addition to regular purging and finding new homes for new toys, avoid giving in to buying just because! I am a reformed toy giver as a reward for making the kids go with me to run errands. Yes, my son had over 50 Hot Wheels before he was 3 because he got a new Hot Wheel every time we went to Target. It was a cheap investment (under a $1 at the time) but what were we to do with all the cars!!! My son didn’t care for the toys because there were so many he didn’t need to. He knew a new one was coming next week! So learn from a former giveaholic…detox the need to give just because!
Less is more. Our kids don’t know this concept. Between getting all the toys from Happy Meals and Party Favors (even now as gift bags after a sporting event!) our kids rarely go without a new toy a week! Think before you give clutter to another family and before you give it to your own. Your kids will survive with less…and you will be surprised how much more they appreciate their toys when they don’t have so many!
What do you do to limit your kids toys? Do you have a creative way of storing them? Do you use a “Two Week Bag” technique? Fill us in on all your great advice and challenges!
About Gail Gray
